Interesting or Interested
I’ve become fascinated with the subject of narcissism. In the past I have look at it as a person with being interesting or being interested. It appears that there is more to it than that and that it is a mix of what I have called covert hostility, anti social personality and the above.
How many people really care about others? How many people are interested enough to ask questions and get a person talking about themselves and their problems, situations, fears etc in life. Or for that matter pointing out the positives about a person’s actions or accomplishments. I for one don’t know too many people who express a lot of interest in me when we talk. I can probably count them on my fingers. I have written somewhere else recently that one of my goals when I communicate is to leave the person feeling a little bit better about themselves, the world or life after we have finished our interaction. The world needs uplifting actions, empathy and compassion. The bright side of life is far more rewarding than the dark side and putting ones attention on the positives is quite often enough to negate the negatives.
I suppose that we all enter our lives in a certain condition. There is the basic personality and that generally will persist through a person’s lifetime. I know that when I am kind to myself, work on my health, am achieving some sort of goals and am being somewhat inspirational that I feel better, more worthwhile and more able to exist in the present. It’s not that I do a lot to help others but I am willing and I am going to do my best to be there for people in need.
The trick is how one responds to others and external stresses. I found myself getting very defensive earlier this week over something very trivial. My reactions brought out the worst in me, I even shared the story with others which makes me wonder what my motivation was because I had consciously decided not to do this. One of the things that I became very aware of this year is that my personal response to people, issues, stresses, problems, disputes, disagreements is paramount in regard to my ability to see the issues clearly and to then be able to take what I hope is the sanest path to improving existing conditions. When it all boils down in regard to matters of pride the truth that I see is that it doesn’t really matter when the penny stops spinning. It will blow over, it will be forgotten,there is nothing one can do to stop another person speaking badly of you, there isn’t really all that much that we can do to help others to become better in our own eyes. If they think that their methods of dealing with life are superior than that’s it, end of story. So once again I have to temper my own pride, ego, self worth and respond in the most empathetic, positive manner in which I am capable. I’m the one who is going to be the winner if I can pull this off. If I am the winner then it can only make me respond to other aspects of my life more positively and then the chances of the world moving on an upward spiral are slightly increased.
